Daily Archives: November 26, 2013

Just find out as much as you can before you marry.

Received message:

I have been married to Egyptian for the past 7+ years. I paid for all his visa, residence and recently his citizenship in the US. The ink was not even dry from his citizenship paper and about a month ago he announced to me that he planned to marry a second wife. He left the US on October 10th, 2013. I found messages between him and his “fiance” saying that they would marry on October 12th. Before he left he tried to convince me that he was not getting married this trip. I know different. He admitted he married in message chat a few weeks ago. Now he says he does not have a second wife. He did not contact me until almost 3 weeks after he arrived in Egypt he has never done that before he always let me know as soon as he arrived and gave me a phone number. I asked him about this and he said that he did not have a phone or internet. I said to him you were on the internet last week and he asked how I knew. I told him that I saw his Facebook postings. I asked him how he was
doing busisness without a phone, he said his partner is the one doing business for him. This man is attached to his phone I know he has a phone there.

The worst part is I was reading some blogs and there were some women who talked about finding out that they were second wives, but did not know it. I believe my husband was already married, then married me and now took on a third wife. He did everything they do when they are hiding the first wife from the foreign wife. He did not tell his parents at first that we were married and then the second time I went to visit he said while we were at his family’s house we could not sleep together. I had to stay in his sister-in-laws room, etc.

This man has taken so much money from me. About a year ago I took a well paying job in China, he said that he wanted to start a business and that he would travel between China and Egypt for business. As soon as I was established in my job he traveled to Egypt claiming his mother was very ill and I helped him with all her Doctor bills. He claimed she needed a specialist and that it would cost several thousand dollars. I was sending him money the whole time he was there including paying for all his trips. He had a good job in the US and he used the Family Leave Act to be with his mother. He did go back to the US and continued to work and came to visit me in China and start buying electronics to take back to Egypt. He took as much money as he could. He did not tell me he had stopped working months ago and all the bills back home were falling behind. Not to mention he was making arrangements to marry the new wife. Apparently the dowry was $40,000 US dollars. I asked him if her pussy was made of gold, he said that since he is already married and wants children that he had to pay, now I realize that I was paying for her. I told him that she is a prostitute and her family are her pimps. A surrogate mother in the US does not cost that much, I told him he was stupid for agreeing to that.


Now I am losing my home and have been working just to catch up on all the bills he left behind. Not to mention he left my kids 16 and 20 by themselves, in a house that we are losing because of him. He came to China and is here now I have not told him were I work or live. He has contacted me via Skype and wanted me to continue helping him with his business. I told him absolutely not. I will not support him and his wife/wives in Egypt. He says I am crazy and that he doesn’t have any other wife, but me. I know this is not the truth.
He was carrying on a relationship with this girl since he had gone to Egypt last year. I had seen messages from her. He and she both claimed that she was a man. I told him/her that we were still married in every sense. He claimed to stop talking to him/her and then when I went to the US in October I found messages from him/her. I had those messages translated by a friend who told me they were getting married as soon as he arrived in Egypt. He told his “fiance” that he was not staying with me while I was in the US and had his friends cover for him, he in fact, was with me until the day he left to Egypt. He lies to her as much as he has lied to me to get what he wants.
Since he left on Oct. 10 his car has been repossessed for non-payment, his license has been suspended for not paying a ticket and he has left me so far behind with everything else. The worst part for me is that he and I had planned living in China for another year or two, because of our “future” plans together, then he pulls this. We were supposed to be working together. Now because of all the bills I have to stay for work and be away from my children and family. He did not care how he hurt me or my kids. Now I am trying to pick up the pieces. He even went shopping with me before he left for Egypt and bought clothes for his “niece” and now I realize he had the nerve and odacity to be shopping for his new wife right in front of me.
He has no shame to his game, even saying that I would never leave him because I care about him. I have been with this man almost 8 years and he was able to scam me and the US goverment for that matter. I found that they advise each other on how to scam us. He has a very good friend that did the same to his American wife and then went back to his first wife in Germany. They are always on the prowl, one is not enough and taking from one women is not enough. They have absolutely no conscience. Not for their victims and they have no remorse for what they do. They think that it is perfectly fine because we are foreign women. They do not respect their Egyptian wife/wives either because they lie to them also.

The worst thing is about 3 years ago I noticed a real change in him and recently found out that he is a crystal meth user. He told his “fiance” that he uses and she said she would not accept that, however, still wanted to marry him. Up until two days ago he wanted to “borrow” money from me. I have cut him off from any communication. He is a heavy drug user and continues to use even in Egypt. He claims he is in “the heaven” there with so much drugs available to him.

Contrary to what he believes, I am divorcing him. I know that he will get what is coming to him. What goes around comes around. I think that this type of person is very dangerous for the fact that he had so much patience in waiting until he became a citizen to show his true colors. I wasted 8 years and so much money it is embarassing. I was married for the right reasons, he used everything he could against me. He was abusive in the beginning (until I pulled an “Enough”) and was verbally abusive the whole marriage.

I posted this for anyone considering marrying an Egyptian (or Middle Eastern), know that they advise each other. They use very suave ways and make you believe they love you as soon as they have you, they use and abuse you. Until they see they can’t use you anymore then they drop you like a hot potato. They are compulsive liars. I wish I knew back when I first met him the things I know about how to tell if they are already married. Know that no matter how sincere they seem about paying you back they will take more than you even thought you could give. They do not adapt to other cultures, I’ve seen that not only with him but with many of his friends. They are very cunning and deceiptful.

I don’t like to generalize about any one group of people and am sure there are men in Egypt that are not like this, but all the people that I have known that married them this has happened.

Everyone is free to do what they want. I am a professional woman and it happened to me. It can happen to anyone.

I wish everyone the best, just find out as much as you can before you marry.

Thanks I needed to get this out.


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November 2013
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